BP #46: A Plea. One Out Of A Million
I have decided to come out off of hiatus for a few moments to write these words. These small seemingly insignificant words because something is weighing ultra heavy on my heart and soul. The past few days have been hard for me I will admit that to you. But I know it will be get better. I know that the future hold bright things. But over the last week or so, a few of my brothers and sisters have given up on the fight, and took their own lives. Of course this is the extreme when it comes to depression. More than one of my friends deal with the DISEASE. It affects countless of our friends and family, and it can take terrible turns in seconds.
I personally have never lost someone to suicide. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think about it. Now I know thinking and living are two very different things, but that doesn’t mean it's not painful. That doesn’t mean that every time I think about getting that phone call, my chest doesn’t ache. It doesn't mean that my eyes don’t water, and my stomach doesn’t turn. Because they do.
As I sit here, music playing in the background, and my thoughts racing through my head, I can’t help but think about it. I can’t help but think about that moment in time, that one second out of a million, where a person says, “Its over.” It baffles me that a person could come to such a point. Life is so full of love, and of hope, and of futures. But...with that being said...people sometimes forget that depression isn’t always a mental set. It’s a mental disorder. These people are sick just like any other person. And just like a sick person, they struggle to crawl out of that yucky feeling they find themselves covered in.
And to those people, I want to say it gets better. If one person reads this and knows that, then I have done my job. If you don’t have anyone you think cares about you, know I care about you deeply. If you don’t have anyone who will fight for you, know I am always up for a battle. If you think you don’t have anyone you can call family, you have at least one family member right here. And even when one person cares for you, if just one person’s heart aches for you...then you are as special, and as awesome as anyone else. Hear me when I say that. Take away everything you think is important. Take away talent, and gifts, and appearance, and shortcomings, and failures. And you, God’s child, and still so so special.
You could change the world. You could change everything, by just saying , “It’s worth it.”
Because...it is. It is.